Posts

Light from Fasting

Today I am in day 30 something of a fast. I am feeling a surge within me as well as a detox of toxic thought. I am feeling clear thinking on the past and feeling led to engage new thoughts about old things.   I pray that the light of Christ illuminates all of our darkness. Alot of the last 8 months here in the UK has been dark for me but I had to see his light in this place in the midst of darkeness. That is what he is teaching me. I saw his light it when you came. I felt it when I was alone in my apartment at times when I looked out of my apartment. I heard his light in the tone of believers in the States as they called me to check in on me and connect me to people here. Just today my friend Phil King, a worship leader in Wyoming, connected me to people here. Gosh, I am so grateful. Now there is a new light emerging. Helping me see him pure and undefiled as well as myself, is the name of the game. I have really surrendered here to all he has for me...I have so much to go but really fe
Post a Comment
Read more

New Season

 I feel like last night I crossed over in to something new. I feel like at first glance its a step in to a new way of thinking and a new level of trusting the Lord. I pray for you that the peace of Christ is in you and surrounds you. Maybe you feel this too. I pray for you often. I pray for your benefit and just overall well being! I am just feeling more and more to pray for your best to come forth and bravery to accept the beauty of God's good and perfect will :) AE
Post a Comment
Read more

Praying for Light

Image
Today was just a tough day but a day with more light. I desire light in my vision and light in even how to pray each day. I ask him what he wants me to see and to light up the areas that most need prayer. I journal these prayers and highlights and I really hope I can give that journal to you some day.
Post a Comment
Read more

Still praying

 I have no idea if you check this any longer but I just wanted to say I am praying daily. I desire him to speak before I do. I am so desperate to speak and revive our connection but when I feel I have the proper fuel I will reach out. I am down low and on my knees asking the Lord to take me further in to the discernment of my season and if I am to attempt this pursuit again with you. So I pray. I lean in. I listen to him. And.... I wait.  Come Lord. Have your way.
1 comment
Read more

Missing the Normal Rhythms

Image
I think one of the things that I miss the most this is the normal rhythms of day-to-day life with you. It’s what I look forward to a lot in our time together in Florida. It’s just the day-to-day rhythms of life. From making food to taking walks to connecting our hearts I look forward to it all. But even the simple moments when we’re just in a grocery store together are some of the most profound ones for me. I actually am so excited to find those profound normal moments with you on this trip. I’m so thankful that in our short time we’ve been able to see each other in some unique fun ways. My prayer for Florida is that we get to peel back another layer of our lives and listen and love each other well. Holy God, take us deeper and connect Michelle and I in ways we can’t even imagine. Fuse us in holiness and love. Lead us Holy Spirit in wisdom and comfort us where we hesitate to reveal ourselves to one another. Oh and I had a visitor this morning. You are the better cuddler tho! 😉😘 Pic o
1 comment
Read more

Thankful in Advance

 I am inching my way closer to seeing you and I am so thankful.  Today I just feel the peace of Christ and I pray and prophesy it in to our time together. God is answering prayers for our time already. Thank you Lord! xo
Post a Comment
Read more

Destination Known

Image
Today I did a little adventure. I took the train north to see the Man City women’s team and didn’t know if I would get caught outside of my local area. I liked the thrill of it! It’s kinda like pursuing you 😜.  It got me thinking about destinations. I wanna get on the ride and know where the destination is. A lot like honoring you and purity. I want to get off at the station called purity. That is the aim and the destination. There will be twists and turns to get there but I have my sights set on it🚉🚆🚂. I am thankful for my trip to see you being less than a week away! woohoo!!
Post a Comment
Read more

Gentle and Aware

Image
 I am so thankful yesterday that you let me in to a hard day. I know that along our journey there will be some tough days and I know life and its circumstances can come at you fast. You welcomed me in to that space and I can better support you now knowing of the difficult day that was yesterday.  I am growing in my gentleness and staying further and further away from fix it mode. I think its hard just to be gentle but if I link that my gentleness can lead me to awareness I see it more of a fruit producer. Maybe that can encourage you too to be this verse just as Jesus was: "Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. " - Matthew 11:29.  I think Jesus knew that his gentleness would produce rest in the other person. Obviously he is God and he can supernaturally give rest but I do want to aim to be Jesus to you in this area. I believe in what he will supernaturally produce in you and us because of his gentl
Post a Comment
Read more

new month, new ground

Image
It's freakin February! whaaaaat. We are almost in the one year anniversary of this crazy thing called Covid 19 but I am more excited for time to go forward for a different reason. I am thankful that as time passes you and I are growing closer.  I feel like its gaining ground. Kind of like our walks. We are walking new paths and discovering whats around the bend and the new sights in each others lives. I am thankful we are learning to do brave things together. I love the fruit of the things we process in the dating class and also the things you brought up from Emily. I hope to continue to journey in this and open up in ways where we feel led. My prayer this morning is that God would give us boldness to share our hearts and journeys more and more as time passes.
Post a Comment
Location: Pryors Bank, Bishops Park, Fulham, London SW6 3LA, UK
Read more

The Little Things

I loved talking to you as you drove in for church. I love how you can just call me even when you are up early and get a chat in. I loved how you you gave great advice about bumping up the trip! Another restful day with you would be paradise.. and a day to sleep in!!! I am so thankful for you babe!
Post a Comment
Read more

Perspective

Image
 I have been thankful for our distance recently because of the gift of sobriety.  I feel my mind being sobered to our moment and just a trip back to the States in general. I feel as if I am seeing things with perspective from the Lord. I am living in the moment but also growing in my understanding of what the Lord is doing.  I feel peace in that. I feel the clouds clearing and a crisp winter air to my mind. I pray today that we continue to hear from him on what he is doing in our lives, what he is telling us to do, and strength to obey what he says.  Winter is bringing clarity.    I pray we receive his glorious eternal vision for our lives.
Post a Comment
Location: London, UK
Read more

being brave for you

 Oh my final thought tonight is that I want to do the hard work to make it. I want to be brave for you. I want to be strong even when you have tough weeks. I will be better and lighter.  Burdens gotta go and peace of Christ come in. Dwell with us Prince of Peace. Amen Love you so much! We have come so far!
Post a Comment
Read more

Feeling the wind tonight

Image
 I end most days on highs with you. Some highs are super easy and its just a crescendo of fun and love that culminates a good phone call or facetime. Other times the highs are after we fight through something and come out on top. I know this has been a tough week. tough because I have emotions and they were weighty. But tonight I felt like I chopped with my machete through jungle of my thoughts to find an oasis of your love.  I felt your heart tonight and felt you bring your heart to the front in the clutch moments of our day. It was like LeBron hitting a game winner.     Thank you for choosing to be with me in this tough week. You could have pulled away but you didn't. You gave you literal all and it was in the midst of your mom's tough week, remembering your father, and our development.  I am so thankful for you... Thank you for bearing with me and bearing with your own heart. You are doing brave ass work. I see it. I am thankful for you. ojos rojos en mis huevos
Post a Comment
Read more

Heavy hearted with you today

Image
 I know today is tough and heavy laden. I wish I could be there to lift you up and carry you through.  Even though I didn't know him, I honor your father and his life.   I miss us. I miss us together. I miss our late night fox walks especially.
Post a Comment
Read more

In Waiting but confident!

 I am waiting for something I am not sure will ever come. It is a hard place to live in. But in that place something is being forged in me: faith. I have let you in to significant places of my heart and as each day passes I feel this exposure to elements without security but I am also realizing I don't need this security in a sense. I am becoming the man God made me to be. I am tender and a deep feeler but I am also creating resolve to love well despite any external circumstances. I really want things to work out for us and sometimes I just have to write out where I actually am. I need to boldly reveal where I am emotionally.  So I am a mixture at times but I am filled with great hope for us Michelle. As I reveal to you where I am in process. Is honesty ok on this blog you have no idea about? lol I am just being real as I do I am learning more of what to flush and keep.   I am so thankful for your lean in lately. Its been so amazing. I feel you closer most days and other days I jus
Post a Comment
Read more